2007/03/15

Satan's Little Mint

A roundup of reactions to faceless and Godless dollars coins:

It's obviously a liberal, secular-humanist plot. First they remove God from the public square then from our money.
Bill O'Reilly, Faux News

Only effete French faggots would use something called a Euro! So we should invade their countries, convert them to Christianity, and force them to use Dollars!
Ann Coulter

It's illegal to deface the national currency, and I accept responsibility for ensuring that we investigate this fully.
Attorney General, Alberto Gonzales

Soaring prices for these coins on eBay should not lead to irrational exuberance in currency speculation.
Former Federal Reserve Chairman, Alan Greenspan

If I get handed one of these, I'll shoot the mother-f*cker!
Vice President, Dick Cheney

Well I think that the Democrats share the blame here. They don't support dollar coins, and this has emboldened our enemies who have removed our sacred symbols from our money.
President, George W. Bush

13 Comments:

Chumps. How do they know the blank coin isn't meant to represent god?
You got their personalities down pat, just in time for St. Pat's day.
It must be the work of Satan...
Chumps. How do they know the blank coin isn't meant to represent god?

"In a supreme, monotheistic, Judeo-Christian deity--or any number of other representations of same, including doubt that such a deity exists, though with acceptance of the possibility...we trust."

And Peacechick...thanks. Dubya is particularly tough.

Fashiongirl... "Could it be...Saaaatannnn?"
Wait, I thought Alan Greenspan was going to be on the dollar coin?
Fashiongirl rightly says "It must be the work of Satan..."

And I take that notion a bit further, suggesting that maybe it is time to honor Satan by depicting him on our nation's currency!

Let's see, there would be Dumbya in a flight suit on the penny, Dick Cheney on the nickel (the new nickels would be made of wood), Ronald Reagan on the dime, Pat Robertson in profile with white powder wig on the quarter (his profile would simply replace that of George Washington), Rush Limbaugh's becysted buttock in full color on the seldom-used half dollar, and Satan himself can be on the almighty one dollar bill. Who would be on the other paper denominations? Mephistopheles on the five, Beelzebub on the ten?

So, yeah, I think money is evil... so why not put evil people and their spiritual leaders on our money? Makes sense to me! 8-)>

"In the Beast we trust"
Just what fucking God are we supposed to be trusting in? The one that GW Bush hears in his head telling him Saddam has WMD and that we should invade? Cause that voice Dubya hears in his head...I don't think that's God...
R-bE... Wait...the guy on the coin isn't Alan Greenspan?

Snave... I think that maybe we should have sponsored money. Instead of "In God We Trust," we could have "This quarter brought to you by Halliburton".

Polishifter... I think we all know who that voice is. Sata--Cheney.
Did anybody notice that the godless coins are worth 50 times as much as the theist ones? That tells ya something.
;-)
That's some good stuff.
Tom...that's the single keenest observation that I've heard about this little mistake! :-)

Nvisiblewmn... I'd love to have one. I'd never get rid of it.
Given the current geopolitical situation and the failing war in Iraq, can we really trust in god any more?
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