2006/12/22

Global Orgasm Day and The Three Criteria

To have a life that's filled with glee
Ladies use these guidelines three:
  1. Find a man who cooks.
  2. Find a man who can fold a fitted sheet.
  3. Find a man who l-urmph-s mrmph-y like a world champion!
Michael of Silly Humans reminds us that it's Global Orgasm Day. So grab that perfect person (see the three criteria :-)) and put some positive energy into the universe. And if any of you guys out there have three criteria for finding the perfect woman (man), I'd love to hear 'em.

18 Comments:

As for a perfect woman, there is no criteria as all women are inherently perfect!
You don't need a partner to play along. Just mention that in passing.
Peacechick, indeed?! No wonder I keep getting asked, "Does this dress make me look fat?" The woman is perfect. The dress is faulty.

SA, that is a very good, if somewhat personal, point! :-)
Just don't want to priveldge the status quo, man.
Hey ladies! When it comes to cooking, I am a professional. And I can fold a fitted sheet. But I didn't quite catch that last one, so I may be disqualified.
Lew...here it is with asterisks: "L**k P**sy"

BTW, like the hat!
"God help the man who waits for the perfect woman!"

God help he who finds her, even more!!"

Global Orgasm Day, eh? Finally!! The world's gonna come together!!
You're supposed to FOLD fitted sheets? What on earth for?
TFWY LMAO! On both counts. {-;

Frog! And I thought l-urmph-s mrmph-y meant "could mumble in acceptance of her every whim".

Thanks for the clarification amigo. That wouldn't have saved either of my marriages, but, "if ya got it, flaunt it" is really some advice I've been working on incorporating for my next, and LAST, attempt at True LoveĀ®.

Thanks again!
You can fold a fitted sheet?
TFWY, well according to Peacechick Mary all women are perfect. So why would one have to wait?

Betty, Rb-E..."folding a fitted sheet" is a metaphor for organization, industriousness, and attention to detail.

Michael, when the arena is the bedroom you have to know the tricks of the trade.
Hey, I knew a man that sent all his clothing, sheets and everything, to the dry-cleaners. EVEN HIS UNDERWEAR!!!
Talk about IMPERFECT.
A perfect woman is:
1. Anti-Dubya.
2. Anti-Fundie.
3. NEVER has a headache.
At least, if I were a liberal man, that is what I THINK they would like in a woman.
And I'm with those on the folded sheets thingie. As soon as they come out of the dryer, onto the bed they go.
Have yourself a great holiday.
OMFG. You have those DESPISED Word Verification letters here, don't you? And you KNOW it takes me 5-6 times before I get it right.
Here goes my first try. ;-)
You know, Kvatch, I usually check to see that my perfect man has clean fingernails and matching socks, but I never even considered #2. Maybe that's what I've been going wrong all this time. And when I finally figured out what you meant by #3, I blushed!

Ahem. So anyway.

Know any single guys that fit that criteria? Help a sista out.
i am a lucky woman- i got one out of three!!
HGC, interesting criteria. I think the first two could be lumped in under "anti-loco", and then maybe add "enjoys sci-fi"? Anyway, about the word verification...sorry but it's a must. Too much comment spam without it.

Mags, I would love to help, but unfortunately all the single men (with clean fingernails and matching socks) that I know...are gay. Hazard of our fair city, I'm afraid. But I'll think on it.

Betmo...which criteria? Wait, wait I don't really want to know. ;-)
Umm, would've been more accurate to say that didn't save ...

Still workin' on that "flaunt it" bit, don't ya know.

BTW, not Gay (though.. well, nevermind that right now) and have got all 3 criteria down pat.

When properly motivated of course. {-;

Okay. Back to my semi-intentional celibacy...
I thought she was melting in the 100 + temps, but perhaps it was an orgasm.
I missed that day. :-( Is it really only once per year?

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