A GOP Message for the Election Season
You see, all you citizens think that you have a right to vote in elections, but that just isn't true. Unless yer state has it in it's constitution, that right doesn't exist, and we're takin' steps to ensure that the wrong sort of people don't get into power. In fact, we don't even want 'em at the polls. That's why the GOP supports legislation in ever state that requires you to show two forms of Republi--I mean--government approved identification and to prove that you drove yer American-made SUV to the polling station.
I think we can all agree that uppity l'bruls taking over Congress is bad for America. Imagine if Nancy Pelosi replaces Denny as the Speaker. She'll probably try to replace our flag with that evil rainbow colored thing that flies over Satan's Hidey-hole (San Francisco). She'll put Italian espresso machines in House lunch room. It will be chaos, and chaos is good for the terrorists.
So, when you hear that your state is tossing voter registration cards into the nearest landfill, just think about something patriotic--like Rummy grinding the evil-doers under his boot--and don't worry. It's all for the best.
I'm George Bush, and I endorse this message.
If you can't put the comical spin on though, its scary. Dammit! Why do I think like that?
TPM, Bush has the most studied, carefully crafted, southern accent I've ever heard. Even a commie-frog like me can hear it. ;-)
'Course, that's only gotten me through 57 years and a year plus, in Nam. I can see why they would suspect me. You can't be too careful. There's a tearwist under your bed as we speak....(: Let us now sing a hymn for gubmint.
James, that's the ace in the sleeve, isn't it!
Troll Watcher, the man may have to head back to Texas yet. I read recently that the Bush compound in Maine is gonna get submerged by rising sea levels.
Peacechick, not a chance. He doesn't need to. At least for this cycle they've got control of the elections officials. Everything will be close, but I bet the Republicans stay in power.
It sure helped those dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.
Maybe he's on to something . . . errr... Or not.
If that actually happens, then the second American Revolution must start on 11/07/06. Have gun, will travel. Coup, anyone?
John, or how about we just remain extra vigilant and catch the f*ckers in the act of rigging the election? I really don't want to see you get arrested.
Kvatch - You're probably right. I mean, the prisons may soon be filling up with Republican buggers! Don't wanna go there. . .
Tom, well unless we can somehow turn the election into Nascar-like spectacle, they could cancel and no one would notice.
John, you did mean "buggers" right? Not "buggerers"? :-)
I'm putting the odds at 50/50 that Bush will cancel the elections and declare martial law. Especially if he can tempt those turrists into attacking us again. He's all but put out a welcome mat for them.