2006/07/05

A Fatwa For Your World Cup

Though I blogged recently that we really need to curb the American enthusiasm for "the other football," I realize that most of the rest of the world really likes the game we call "soccer". And so I don't think that I'm wrong in saying that this cannot stand. The Islamists must be taught once and for all the consequences of interfering with the world's favorite sport.

I propose "A coalition of the swilling," made up of football hooligans from all over the world. Armed to the teeth, they will go to Somalia and teach these servants of Satan that you don't mess with the World Cup...or it's fans.

11 Comments:

Fair go, it was the game Italy won. I'm surprised there weren't more casualties after that upset.
Britain lost a young soldier was worked to death the next day for getting overexcited. This is serious stuff!
And now we are left with a final between two teams no self respecting...
Oh dear, better not stir up any more manic thoughts and deeds.
Damn straight, I'll go.

I agree TV is basically evil and I don't watch it, but the World Cup?!

and don't even TALK to me about the final game(s) - jeeze I mean WTF - okay stopping myself, its cartledge's fault, he got me thinking about Italy and France and and .... stop now... I just can't discuss it rationally.
Whatever will be...will be.
Or maybe we could just sneak booze into their water supply or something. The lack of booze might be at the root of their problem.
All I can say about the World Cup is that I'm sad Portugal didn't win.

My parents are from Portugal (actually, the Azores Islands which are part of Portugal and are located about 900 miles west of Portugal) and the various Portuguese communities in Massachusetts were just SO elated that Portugal made it to the semi-finals - especially since they weren't pegged to go this far. Everyone was watching futbol and enjoying themselves. It would have been nice to see them in the final game.

Here in Red Sox nation, we had a saying up until 2004, "Wait 'til next year". So, all I'm going to say about Portugal is "Wait 'til 2010" :)
Betty, it was booze commericials on television that I think got the World Cup banned in the first place.

Callooh, Cartledge... I feel your pain. Italy? France? What kind of a World Cup final is that. Oh well, you gotta root for Italy in my opinion. What do the French know about football?

Elsa, Portugal is a wonderful country. I visited in 2001 and could definitely have gotten behind them. France? Bah!
please just let Portugal beat Germany... please

and de French? Thbbbt!! I did not know dey even 'ad a team. A bald 'eaded one at dat. Who could cheer for a bunch of baldie french men? I will not speak of dem again.

The Italians are much better looking anyway.
I can find not one redeeming feature in the World Cup finalists.
Not only that, my thugby team lost as well!
I agree with you, Kvatch - Portugal is a wonderful country (although I am bias). It's a small, charming, quaint place and the people are pretty cool, too. It would have been nice to root for an underdog. Even Dick, who is mostly French, was rooting for Portugal.
"Soccer" is a long-standing Military Sports Industrial Complex plot to create a sports parallel to the Cold War. Soccer is to be the foreign threat to football, which is the most American of the sports except for baseball.

The plot has taken longer than expected, but is succeeding. For example, today the World Cup is covered extensively by the Mainstream Sports Media. And look at the number of kids who have joined secret futbol cells, known as "soccer teams"--and they even have their mothers drive them to and from the planning meetings! And it's all a stalking horse for the Military Sports Industrial Complex.

"But Mr_Blog," you may ask, "do you have any hard evidence for this 'Military Sports Industrial Complex'?" Yes I do: soccer balls are covered with Pentagons.
Cartledge, who's your "thugby" team? Me? It's the All Blacks (don't hit me!)

Elsa, I'd love it if Portugal beat Germany (though don't tell that the to the Frogette).

Mr_Blog, my god man, you're right! I never saw it before. Pentagons indeed.

Add a comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link