2006/05/14

Future Headlines - Bush Goes Negative One Last Time

Washington (f-A-ke. P.) - President Bush saw his approval ratings dip into negative territory today when it was revealed that even the nation's dead don't approve of the job he is doing. In office largely due to House Majority Leader, Nancy Pelosi's May pledge not to impeach the President, Mr. Bush responded by mentioning that those dead Americans were obviously not right with the Almighty, and so he didn't have to pay attention to them anyway.

In related news, a number of prominent liberals have recently floated the notion of impeaching Representative Pelosi herself. One source, speaking on the condition of anonymity said, "Well, if we can't have Bush, I'd be willing to settle for Pelosi's stupid skinny ass."

16 Comments:

In a related story, President Richard M. Nixon's approval ratings have skyrocketed. The dramatic jump is believed to be related to dead Americans feeling more rapport with the now deceased ex-president.

When questioned during a seance, one departed soul is quoted as saying "At least Nixon is completely dead. Bush is just dead from the neck up."
Sounds like Fitzgerald will need to investigate Ipsos et al's polling records.
There is obviously a grave inbalance in this story.
Her or Feinstein, toss em' all out!
That's a good way to fight the terrorists! Impeaching America's Commander-in-Chief during wartime! Stupid liberals!
Perhpas this is just a dodge from all the wingnuts who might want to turn Bush's impeachment into a campaign issue.
Pelosi is a wuss, indeed. I am so p.o.ed that she made that statement. WTF.
Did you see the thing on Showtime where the dead registered their displeasure with the president?
;-)

(And give Pelosi a break...I'm not thrilled with what she said, but she's been doing great work overall.)
Xsociate... :-) :-) :-)

Carrie, alwasy a delight to have you pop by to set us straight.

Tom, oh, no, no, no, No, NO I don't have to cut Pelosi a break. Promising to abrogate one's constitutional duty, in public, for the equivalent of minor political ducats doesn't get my admiration, and anyway...it's satire.
I saw that Pelosi pimpin' herself to the conservatives for no good reason the other day in our local rag. I couldn't beleive it - pledge not to impeach, my goodness, what does she need some violation of the law by the W, Rove and co to do it? Oh, but wait, they already have that. Another reason to be anti-incumbent this November.
I want Bush impeached and tried as a criminal - war or no war. Illegal isn't something that we can tolerate at anytime. Furthermore, this is not our war - it's his, so he can take it with him when he goes and that can't happen soon enough for me.
Ahmen! I hope a good stiff wind blows her back to dumbville.
typical democrat. no spine, don't stand for anything. if bush isn't impeachable, i don't know who the fuck is
LoC, unfortunately it's not bloody likely. Pelosi routinely gets elected with as much as 80% of the vote. She hasn't had a serious challenger in years.
Pelosi, I recommend you begin to acknowledge you are expendable!
Even the dead disapprove of Dumbya... well I say, "Long live the dead!!"
Pelosi is about as much of a "leader" as I am Elvis Presley. Running close behind for Leader Loser of the decade is that screamin' demon Dean. Any party that even gives thought to Bush's Reprieve bill, is a traitor. A lot of Democrats showed they are anything but. It almost makes you wish that plane that crashed in in PA had made it..(:

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