2006/04/20

Future Headlines: Bill Clinton To Be The New Press Secretary

The administration announced today that Bill Clinton has been appointed to take Scott McClellan's place as Press Secretary. When asked about the wisdom of appointing a former President and prominent Democrat to such a visible post, President Bush replied, "Well you know, nobody connects with the American people they way Bill Clinton does. I think the American people deserve that."

Pundits hailed the move as the salvation of Bush's ruined second term, and overnight polls show his approval rating leaping 20 points.


My eternal gratitude to Hellpig for his inspired commentary on the subject without which this post would not be possible.

10 Comments:

While I find it most likely that Clinton could be the only thing to stop Bush from circling the bowl, I do have to say this: Sweet Jesus... Hellpig inspired you... YIKES!
Whoa... at first I thought this was real and Bush must have read the RS article about him being the worst president of all time, partly by not being bipartisan in time of war.

This is a great idea, actually. If he did appoint Clinton (Secretary of State or ambassador to UN would be much better), he'd improve in just about every poll out there (and give us a little hope, too).
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Peace to you and yours kvatch.
That is pretty funny. Maybe he can lineup a decent BJ for the Glorious Leader and then maybe he will stop killing people.

btw- You can expect the Pig to sign as me. Or anybody else. To do so the Pig picks "other" then enters the victims name on top and the url on the bottom.
Types his crap and bingo he spews.

He can't do it if in comments one changes from "anyone" to "registered users".

Peace. Your Fellow Human
In the latest news... Bill Clinton, tipped to become next voice of the President, has quietly slipped out of the country.
A spokesthing for Clinton said that he was taking advantage of great surf in Australia for a few years.
The reports are unconfirmed yet, but a Sydney intern is quoted as saying she is looking forward to 'Billie' return.
BRILLIANT!!!!!
No doubt, there will be a regular supply of interns to serve the former president while he stands at the podium. Clinton's comment regarding the staffing move, "I wouldn't have done it unless I knew that I could recieve felatio while addressing the press. It's a great turn on for me." Once the Bush people promised the luxury, he agreed to step up to the plate.
That's sadly funny... :>(
That's sadly funny... :>(

And it would be true, too. Maybe Clinton could take a more prominent position...say...Vice President?
I have to thank Hellpig too. I'm not surprised Bush chose Clinton. After all, he recognizes the same sterling qualities in Clinton that he himself possesses!

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