2006/02/15

What If Whittington Dies?

Since no one seems to be getting away from this story--while we wait for the Big Dick's Softball Pitchto be broadcast on FOX--I'd like to pose a simple pair of questions...

What if Harry Whittington dies? Will the veep be charged with manslaughter?

(Ok...ok, I've got an observation as well.)

I'm not a hunter, but it seems to me that one could apply a simple rule: If the gun is parallel to the ground, don't pull the trigger!

13 Comments:

Not a chance. They'll make the autopsy show something different.
Yeah, I agree with Mike on this one. "They" would move heaven and earth to make sure Cheney emerges from this unscathed.

I mean, Whittington is already quoted as saying something to the effect of "I don't know what all the fuss is about."

Oy.
Cheney said today that he thought it was right to have Mrs. Armstrong leak the story to the press. he insists it was the right thing to do. But why not do it himself?

Oh, I like your hunting rule of thumb KVatch.

Blog on.
Aw, look at him..LOOK AT HIM! Does he look evil to you?


(star wars music playing)
Aw, look at him..LOOK AT HIM! Does he look evil to you?
(star wars music playing)


Bum, bum, bum bum-da-dum, bum-da-dum...

Neil had a great pick of the Veep hiding disguised as Darth Vader.
Just because Whittington had a bird shot pellet in his heart muscle doesn't mean that Cheney was responsible for it being there, does it?
Why is this silly little story taking valuable airtime away from the impending TomKat split? WHY?!
Oh, I like your hunting rule of thumb KVatch.

Hey, thanks. Seemed to make sense, but I'm sure there is a hunter out there to tell me why not.

Just because Whittington had a bird shot pellet in his heart muscle doesn't mean that Cheney was responsible for it being there, does it?

Lew, you don't mean....A SECOND SHOOTER! OMG! Get the ballistics team! Call your senators for the congressional inquiry! Call the National Archive to bury the report for the next 40 years!
haha - saw you on toosaucy and that was funny and all but I think Btitt Hume was actually ok with the questions
Now, before you hippies start hyperventhilating on your own conspiracy theories, remember that the Kenedy County Sheriff's Office has already cleared Cheney of any criminal wrong-doing.

As for that America-hating quail, well, it'd be irresponsible to comment on an active investigation.
If it weren't Cheney, even wreckless endangerment could be a stretch since eye witnesses say that Whittington did not announce he was rejoining the group - which I'm given to understand - is a hunting no-no.

But, it's Cheney. So if he dies. It will be from something other than being shot by the Vice President. They will find another cause of death.

As regards your gun fire rule -

I'm an animal rights activist. I'm also pro-hunting. That probably seems like a contradiction in terms, but let me explain: Animals that live out their lives in the wild actually get to have a life. The treatment of domestic cattle, pigs, chicken, etc. is horrific. Many are held in cages so small they are never able to stretch their limbs or in some cases even stand. Ever. And then they are slaughtered in ways Hitler would have found barbaric.

However, what Cheney was doing was not hunting. He pulled up in a car and a bunch of quail which had been "farm raised" in conditions which prevented them from ever attaining full use of their wings were flung loose from a net while the VP and his cronies all took shots at them.

He went on a similar "hunt" in the fall, and managed to kill dozens of pheasants (around 40 I think), and hundreds of ducks.

This isn't even close to hunting. This is mass murder, and Cheney is a serial killer.

But we all knew that last part already, right?

When the secret police come and take me away for writing this, will you guys try to get me out of jail?
I learned how to handle a gun better at the age of 13 than Dick Cheney apparently knows how now. (I quit hunting while still a teen, but I've been on a few bird hunts in my life.) I've even had birdshot rain down on me -- from a distance of about 300 feet or more. The shooter who had stupidly pointed his gun in my general direction at the time was castigated by everyone else in the group for not paying attention, though I was none the worse for wear. Only point being, it's not that hard to observe the rules of gun safety if you're sober and intelligent. Of course, that would leave the VP and most anyone else in his administration out.

As for Whittington, I predict that he will mysteriously perish in a small plane crash sometime in the next couple months.
Whittington's death would be a big blow to the Republicans. I understand he's a big campaign contributor.

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