2006/01/03

Punishing Illegal-Immigrant Aid Doesn't Go Nearly Far Enough

Buried in the recently passed Border Security bill, is a provision that makes it a federal crime to offer assistance to illegal immigrants. Opponents have pointed out that nurses, social workers, and even priests could face up to five years in prison for offering aid to illegal immigrants. Representative F.J. Sensenbrenner Jr. (R. WI), who introduced the legislation, has vigorously defended it, calling into question our nation's flagging respect for it's own immigration laws, and I agree.

But why stop with punishing people who knowingly give services and assistance to illegals. I say let's get the unwitting as well. Give a dollar to a homeless illegal--How about a day in the county lockup? Give to a charity that helps illegal immigrants--Time for a tax audit! Treat an illegal immigrant--Maybe you should lose your license to practice medicine? As for the colleagues and spouses of illegal workers (also mentioned as potential targets) no vague punishments here. Deport 'em! Serve them right for not doing their patriotic duty.

California-Mexico Border FenceJust imagine the collateral benefits of broadening the crackdown. The homeless problem will disappear when it becomes clear that nobody can risk giving even the smallest amounts for fear of helping the wrong sort of person. Charities will have to be accountable directly to the government. (Hey maybe we could put them all under the control of the faith-based initiative and run the whole thing through Homeland Security.) Those deported colleagues of illegals will take their skills overseas, and if we do this right they could keep right on working for their existing employers but at lower cost. We'll call it...deport-a-shoring. And finally, as illegal immigration drops off completely, we'll be able to dismantle the California - Mexico border fence, melt it down, and build monuments to our vision.

So many benefits! Now wonder President Bush praised the legislation, saying:
America is a nation built on the rule of law, and this bill will help us protect our borders and crack down on illegal entry into the United States. Securing our borders is essential to securing the homeland.

11 Comments:

Funny, the Nazi's had similar laws regarding the helping of Jews by the German Community.

I'm torn on the whole immigration issue. I lived in Southern California a good half of my life, in a city that was rife with illegal immigrants. It can be reasonably argued that illegals push state costs up, especially in regards to social services. It can also be argued, though, that many of the communities in the central valley where I lived would not have exist if it weren't for illegal immigrants coming over the border to work the fields that white people are pretty much to lazy to do.

I have to think, though, that there is a solution out there regarding the border problem that doesn't involve draconian measures against specific a race of people.
Wow ... a gated community within a bigger gated community! Our property values will skyrocket!
Wow ... a gated community within a bigger gated community! Our property values will skyrocket!

Moreover, I really think that this "deport-a-shoring" idea could gain some traction. Think of the corporate benefits. Think I'll blog on this later this week.
I really like that idea about turning the whole program over to Faith Based Homeland Security. I also believe we should have a Faith Based Department of Defense. And a Faith Based Department of Education. And we should create a new Department of Faith...which should probably be Faith Based too.
Did you see the people they called out as examples? Nurses, doctors, social workers- for providing services (ie. care) to illegal immigrants?

Un-fucking-believable.

And that dude Sennsenbrenner(or whatever is name is a total whack-job. Really. He's the poster-boy for today's GOP.
Funny, I thought our country was built by illegal immigrants. Awh, what the hell fuck em. I don't like cheep grapes anyway.
What about letting one sleep on your couch? If so, I'm in trouble..

Christ, I do support punishing employers for recruiting and hiring illegal immigrants by the dozen, but what this law is essentially doing is making it a crime to be a nice to an illegal immigrant.
Won't some of the illegal immigrant problems be solved once they build that big fence???
What about letting one sleep on your couch? If so, I'm in trouble.

For that you get your couch confiscated and in return have to sit on a hair-chair that's not quite wide enough and that has no arms.

But seriously, the law's a subjective nightmare that's primed for abuse by over zealous Justice Dept. officials. My guess is that it'll get quashed in the Senate.
You laugh about unintentional support, but that's how the terrorism laws are written.

Mike
Darn. And I just bought this couch too.

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